Things I've been rejected from // "shadow CV":

2017 Light Works AIR 2018 ($10)
2017 Assistant Professorship, California university (no response received)
2017 Assistant Professorship in Photography, Virginia public university (no response received)
2017 Assistant Professorship in Photography, Ohio public university (no response received)
2017 Professorship in Photography, Arizona public university (no response received)
2017 Assistant Professorship, Kansas City area institution
2017 Tenure Track Assistant Professorship, New York State public university
2017 Tenure Track Assistant Professorship, Kentucky liberal arts college
2017 Tenure Track Assistant Professorship, North Carolina public university
2017 Contract Assistant Professorship, Florida area college
2017 Tenure Track Assistant Professorship, Florida area university
2017 Tulsa Artist Fellowship
2017 Sharpe-Walentas Studio Program
2017 Visiting Assistant Professor, Pennsylvania liberal arts College
2017 Vermont Studio Center ($25) [ok, I wasn't really rejected - I was actually very graciously accepted with a merit grant + work study, but I could not attend my allotted session due to my being in Galveston.]
2017 Sabbatical Replacement, Minnesota area liberal arts college
2017 Assistant Professorship, New York City area college
2017 Assistant Professorship, (another) Minneapolis area university
2017 Skowhegan ($80)
2017 Fine Arts Work Center Fellowship ($57)
2017 Tenure Track Assistant Professorship, Minneapolis area university
2017 Tenure Track Assistant Professorship, Minnesota public university
2017 Assistant Professorship, Chicago area university
2017 Hinge Arts Residency
2016 Djerassi Artist Residency ($45)
2016 Hamiltonian Fellowship ($30)
2016 Galveston Artist's Residency (Top 12 Finalist, 200+ applications)
2016 Roswell Artist's Residency ($25)
2016 Tulsa Artist Fellowship
2016 Recess Open Call (finalist)
2016 Fire Island Artist's Residency ($45 - 400+ applications)
2016 Visiting Assistant Professorship, West Virginia area college (application due February 19th, notice given May 17th)
2016 Sharpe-Walentes Studio Program (1300 applications, 17 available studios; jury members Tara Donovan, Keltie Ferris, Dread Scott, Joel Shapiro, Alexi Worth)
2016 Kimmel Harding Nelson Center for the Arts Residency ($35 - finalist, wait-listed: 242 applications, 38 awarded residencies)
2016 Roswell Artist's Residency ($25 - 250+ applications, 7 awarded residencies)
2016 Vermont Studio Center ($25)
2016 Whitney ISP ($15 App. fee, $50 printing images fee, $20 postage)
2016 Project 387 Residency ($25)
2016 Skowhegan ($25 - 2100+ applications, 65 openings)
2016 Elsewhere Southern Constellations Residency ($25 - wait-listed - 200 applications for 40 residency opportunities)
2016 Fine Arts Work Center ($57 - 705 applications, 46 finalists)
2016 Art OMI
2016 SWAP Residency, Cleveland (Nominated)
2016 Smack Mellon Studio Program
2016 Container Artist Residency ($25)
2015 Harpo Foundation Emerging Artist Fellowship ($35)
2015 Denali National Park Artist in Residence
2015 Real Time & Space Residency ($7)
2015 Vermont Studio Center Residency Fellowship ($25)
2015 Please Hold Magazine, "Home" Issue ($15)
2015 Kimmel Harding Nelson Center for the Arts Residency ($35)
2015 Field Projects Gallery Open Call #28 ($25)
2015 Hordaland Kunstsenter Residency
2015 Teton Art Lab Artist in Residence ($25)
2015 Hawaii Volcanoes National Park Artist in Residence ($70, finalist)
2015 Visiting Professorship at a Tennessee University
2015 Dry Tortugas National Park Residency ($50, finalist)
2015 Arlington County, VA Public Art Show (re:collective)
2015 Arlington County Art Center Gallery Show (re:collective)
2015 Hamiltonian Artists Fellowship (Finalist, then Alternate)
2015 FIre Island Artist Residency ($25)
2015 Another permanent teaching position at a DMV area community college.
2015 Permanent teaching position at a DMV area community college
2015 Whitney Independent Study Program ($15)
2015 Skowhegan ($50)
2015 Art OMI Residency
2014 Linus Gallery, "Hollywood" call for art ($25)
2014 Southern Graphics Conference International Peculiar Places Exhibit (NoVA Printmaker's Guild)
2014 Beyond Printmaking 4 at Texas Tech University School of Art ($40)
2014 Wassaic Haunted Mill One Week Residency (No response received)
2014 ICPNY New Prints Autumn
2014 Employment - Technical position at New Jersey Higher Education Institution (Interviewed)
2014 Employment - Technical position at California Higher Educational Institution (Interviewed Twice)
2014 Employment - Technical position at New York City Higher Educational Institution
2014 Employment - Technical position at New York City Higher Education Institution (never received any information regarding application.)
2014 Open Spaces Chattanooga (re:collective)
2014 Acre Residency ($25)
2014 Fire Island Artists Residency ($25)
2012 Fire Island Artists Residency ($25)
2011 Hamiltonian Fellowship
2011 Point Foundation Scholarship (semi-finalist)
2011 Columbia University Visual Arts MFA Program ($100)
2011 UCLA Visual Arts MFA Program ($90) 
2011 University of Southern California Visual Arts MFA Program ($85)
2011 University of Michigan Visual Arts MFA Program ($75 + $10 Slideroom Fee)
2011 Rhode Island School of Design Digital + Media MFA Program ($60)
2010 Virginia Museum of Fine Arts Fellowship
2009 Point Foundation Scholarship
2008 Optic Nerve @ Artisphere